Men aren’t objects either

I am not typcially the type of person who would involve herself with anything Cosmopolitan. But, they have a Snapchat story that I quite enjoy browsing through because of its funny sayings and interesting stories.

But then I come to the sex overload that Cosmopolitan is known for. I have chosen for moral reasons not to have sex before marriage. I don’t expect that a lot of other people are doing the same. But I feel like there can be an agreement, even among those of differing points of view about sex, that Cosmo goes way too far in its sexual objectification of men. For instance,  throughout this 2015 pre-Christmas season, they had little videos of shirtless men saying dirty ‘holiday’ things. They have pictures of men in various stages of undress all the time, to make us ‘feel better’ and to drive out Monday blues.

Cosmo, if women shouldn’t be objectified, then neither should men. If women can be up in arms about people viewing them as objects, so can (and should) men. I am always struck by how there are no women doing similar ‘sexy’ things on the Cosmo snapchat, or even how on Buzzfeed there are lists upon lists of dirty pictures of men and captions that focus solely on his desirable body, but rarely, if ever, do they have the same for women. Women are much more celebrated and praised, for their bodies sometimes, but usually for their achievements and brains, on both of these sites. On the flip side, Playboy recently decided to remove the pictures of the naked women. Granted, woman are still being objectified in this magazine and in many other ways throughout the world, but this constant barrage of the male body, from sources that are not pornographic magazines, but instead mainstream sites and magazines that are used by millions of people, makes me think that we have a double standard that runs miles deep in our society.

Men should not be made into objects, and the blatant casualness of the objectification of men throughout society, and the fact that many people are willing to go up in arms against woman being objectified but not men, saddens me a great deal.

I don’t want anyone objectified.

So, no Cosmo and Buzzfeed, I won’t be taking part of that content. And if you had any respect for men, you wouldn’t allow it either.


Because Lip Synchs bring out my inner (kind of) feminist….

I am glad the rest of the world has jumped on the bandwagon of appreciating a good lip synch contest. From the ones that Jimmy Fallon hosted on his late night show to the new show on Spike “Lip Synch Battle,’ lip syncs are a fascinating beast. You might not have the pipes, but you can pretend to. It is particularly hilarious to watch someone like Dwayne ‘the Rock’ Johnson sing Taylor Swift and knock it out of the park. But you know what is not entertaining? An overwhelming amount of women deciding that the only way to impress a crowd or make them laugh during these contests is to act so inappropriately that I felt dirty watching. Is there a reason Jimmy Fallon can lip synch a show-stopping “Like a Prayer” without acting like a strip tease, but Emily Blunt and Anne Hathaway did renditions of “Wrecking Ball” and “No Diggety” and proceeded to rub their bodies suggestively and pretend to give lap dances?

No good reason? Just as I suspected.

I find this issue is not something that is only present in lip synch battles. There are of course exceptions but often when women try to entertain it is often at the detriment to their dignity as a woman. Whether it is playing dumb or using a continuous stream of curse words, I’d like to call out my fellow women to stop thinking they need to lower themselves in order to be funny or liked or esteemed. Now, men are guilty of throwing their dignity under the bus for the same reasons, but as a woman, I feel I can speak better to and for the women.

Ladies, I want to be able to turn on stand-up from a woman comedian and not worry that she is going to spend the next hour doing little more than cursing and telling me about her latest sexual exploits. I want female leads in movies and shows that are not constantly using their sexuality or their middle finger attitude to attain their goals. I’d like rap songs that are not about sex and using women. I would also like the complacency in the face of degradation of anyone, especially women, to stop. We should not listen, watch, or buy anything that doesn’t treat anyone as they do not deserve. You are irreversible and unique. You do not need that popular song about it being ok to be a stripper. Usher, please do mind if she is disrespecting herself. Be a human and stand up for her.

Women, you can be everything you want to be without allowing your dignity to take a back-seat. I mean it. So you stick out like a sore thumb in society-well, that ache that you feel for standing up for yourself and your dignity is worth it. And you will find that others will be attracted to how you live differently and soon you will find others who desire to live like you. Then the movement gets bigger and then lives are charged and the world is that much better.